No no no no no. Do not ever say you are not worthy. You are worthy and supported. Everyone’s journey is different, but when you take the path seeking justice and uncovering truths, especially about repression, then you will find yourself at odds with many, including those set out odd to deceive and destroy that path. You have such a unique journey, and I’ve reflected on that, how you’ve fought from the right wing with a military background to open-minded thinking, almost upset it seemed to me (and maybe it’s just my projection) at having lived under a cloud of deception to a way of expressing an emotional desire for some type of clarity in your search. And your photos have definitely shown us a stark confrontation with a clear eye into those people caught in the eye of storm in our nation’s capital.
Please stay in touch and know you are deeply supported and your contributions have effected those of trying to find out way down these dark alleys of a collective darkness controlled by those forces of white racist intent and their deceptive tactics meant to bend your mind and twist your core, tangling you up into knots of defeat. Your humanity you reveal shows a strong hunger for a search, one that fights through opaque clouds full of entangling mistakes and doubts but one which ultimately shines light for those looking to see better these truths your journey reveals.
You are correct that the psychology toll is hard to overcome than the physical. Stay well and strong and know when you fell weak or low there are those of us who support your voice and efforts and you stay with you so you rest in times you need to retreat and recover. Much support to you.